The snow was missing, but I wasn't necessarily missing the snow. It's always nice to see the beauty of it, just never nice to have to drive around in it. That's the blessing and the curse of living in the midwest.
Christmas this year was an emotional grab bag. The pressure at work has been building, things in our home life have been pushed back so everything has been last minute for Christmas. Friday night, our little dog ate enough chocolate to give himself chocolate toxicity, and of course he did so when the vet was closed and it was Christmas weekend. I had to induce vomiting, buy activated charcoal capsules and rip them apart, mix them with water, hold him down and syringe them down his throat, then clean up seven piles of vomit all night long. That same night, as I was wallowing in my bad luck and worrying about my dog, my mom told me to watch the news. It turns out my cousin Heidi was robbed. They took everything out from beneath her tree, and several other items from the house. She'd gotten over a thousand dollars in presents for her family, all three kids, and it was all gone. I was devastated for her, and to think that there is anyone out there who could do such a thing.
I got to see my parents and little sister last night for a bit, which was wonderful. Today was Christmas at home with the kids, and it was the first year our oldest son was not here for morning presents, since he moved out in September, so that felt not-so-good. He met up with us at Steve's parents' house today for Salisbury Christmas, so that was nice. He got us all gift cards to the places we love the most -- I got Dunkin' Donuts :) Hoping to spend some time with my brother and his family in the coming week as well.
The kids got few things under the tree this year, but we spent more than we have in the past. Aria got a Kindle and Batman Converse, and she couldn't possibly have been more excited. Michael got a cell phone (finally!) that's also an MP3 player, so he's psyched, and we paid for the first month of service. He also got some nice gloves for his punching bag downstairs. I might steal them from time to time to work out some of my excess aggression. Daily.
With January right around the corner, I start the resolutions in my head once again. There are so many things I always want to change, to improve upon, to evolve. There are so many things I want to better about myself, about my surroundings. Goals, ideas, lists. All part of the Journey, you know.
Really, what I'm looking for is peace. I've been told that peace comes through acceptance. I can accept that. Heh. It makes sense, doesn't it? We can't stop the struggles from coming, we can't stop the trials from occurring. Bad, bad things will happen. They just will. We have no power over them. But being able to accept whatever life throws at us and to roll with the punches, that's what gives us peace. We can attempt to minimize our own negative input, and we can attempt to show compassion and forgiveness towards others. Perhaps these are my new goals -- minimize negativity and maximize compassion.
Now, if only I can get all these stupid jerks in my society to do the same.
(Yes, that was a joke.)
I might not have mentioned it yet, but I'm wearing the fluffiest, fuzziest robe ever which my loving husband got me for Christmas, along with the fluffiest, fuzziest Michigan slippers. I adore him. He's not one of the aforementioned stupid jerks. At least, not usually.
I hope that everyone out there had a blessed Christmas. Here's to the rest of 2011 treating you well, and 2012 being the best year ever for us all.
Stephanie Jean
This peace you speak of, is something I have been trying to attain for more years than I can remember. I have tried many a number of things...But honestly, I cannot stick with them for long. I think that may be in part, due to a lack of patience...mainly for the human race. My resolution list is long...longer each year. Heres to being able to accomplish the top 3
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