Choosing Joy

Snarky. Sarcastic. Scathing. These are the comments, the posts, the statuses, and the 'likes' that seem to rule Facebook. My husband deleted his account recently because of how rampant passive-aggressiveness runs there. I can't say that I disagree with him. My original view of Facebook wasn't wrong -- I never wanted to join, because I knew it would take up a great deal of my time, it would keep me from doing a great deal of things I need to do, and it would become more of a burden than a friend. That being said, I'm not to the point where I want to delete my account. At least, not quite.

I've decided to make the rest of December "Positive Status Month", at least for myself. I'm so sick of feeling sorry for myself, and the temptation to post something so that other people feel sorry for me, too. I appreciate the forum that this blog allows me. I attempt in every way possible to use it for the betterment of myself and perhaps for the few others that are in the habit of reading it. I want very much to join into whatever positive realm around me that God has provided as an outlet. So this month, I'll be posting at least one positive status on Facebook each day, along with positive and inspirational quotes and/or stories in my newsfeed. It's my hope that others might join in with me and that, by January, the feeling won't fade. A high goal, I realize, but it's worth a shot, don't you think?

The quote I most recently posted was one I've written upon before. It's painted above my husband's work space at our job: "I discovered I always have choices, and sometimes it's only a choice of attitude." -- Judith Knowlton. It's the truth. I might be enduring what I feel to be unimaginable circumstances, great pain emotionally and/or physically, and I might feel trapped, or that I have no choice in anything that's happening to me. But I do always have the choice of attitude. I can let the negativity pervade my spirit and leave me bitter, jaded, resentful, and full of anger and hatred. Or I can choose to "accept life on life's terms" (p. 417, Big Blue Book) and remain positive and joyful regardless of the circumstances. The bottom line is, the circumstances are going to occur regardless of my attitude. Why waste time allowing the bitterness and resentment to grow, thereby doing nothing but making me feel worse and worse with each passing day, inevitably making things worse for those around me because negativity breeds negativity? Why not focus on the positive things (which there always are, even if not on the surface) and allow my heart to be grateful, full of hope and happiness, even in the midst of a crisis? I reiterate: the crises will occur anyhow. The choice is in what we make of them.

Today has been restful, a rare occurrence in our weeks and months. Football, coffee, robes all day, time together as a family, no rehearsal, nowhere to go, no obligations. Just a warm, comfy couch covered in blankets. I'm grateful. I'm joyful. I'm close to being unemployed after Christmas, but I'm joyful.

That's a choice of attitude.

Stephanie Jean